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Friday, June 19, 2009

Me in L's alien specs.. before I handed it back to him. Looks pretty normal doesn't it?

Such a long time since I last blogged.. back from Macau and busy catching up with friends.. But here's my viewpoint of the world..

Had an epic day when Lance's Thai girlfriend messaged him saying, "I miss you, do you miss me?" and I kicked up a big ruckus about it, and she said, "Don't fear, u wife Lance, me wife too. Y?" I then decided it was better to show her pity instead. Seriously, the names of these nationalities are tarnished by these so-called representatives. Like for instance, China has Dragon Girls, Thailand has prostitutes and whores, so does Vietnam. At first, my impression of Thai girls were okay, until I found how just how low they can go, and it takes just one crack to break the whole glass. Same goes for China, they were okay to me until it almost happened to my family, and it happened to my friends. Shameless is what I'd call it. Absolute black sheeps. Which reminds me of racial stereotypes.. Foreigners and such. Personally, my view of them is guilty until proven innocent, sad but true.

I digress. Watched Ghost of Girlfriends Past with Yink and Lance, who was seated one row behind, 6 seats away and snoring so loudly, my gosh. 

Embarrassing but what do you do when you love somebody? Oh well.. and Yink's face under medication, as though it was burnt.. but it got better already.

I am hereby addicted to shopping, and foie gras.

Tuesday, June 09, 2009

Does anybody know where to get that feathery jacket in the video, or something simiar? It's beautiful, it's sort of inspired me to include feathers in apparel designs. I can't wait to get started! 

My body clock is so backwards that I think I've missed out a span of at least 3 days in my life before switching back to awake-in-the-mornings-and-asleep-at-night. But nonetheless, le pig is still fast asleep and in the midst of sitting around doing basically nothing, I ran some errands.

Picked up the laundry, which was amazingly packed in clear plastic bags and neatly pressed. Gotta love it! But imagine the amount of plastic they use.. Boo for the environment. But hurray for the effort. I'm gonna miss this sort of pampering when I get back to Singapore, but at least I still have my boy/maid. He spoon-fed me my supper last night because I was too tired! It's times like these that makes me love his goofyness, even though his chew-kena-kah, like he always says of me. Amidst him hiding in his cave of bedsheets, he is too effing cute and obnoxious.

Then, got myself a salmon sandwich from the bakery downstairs. And hid myself in the bathroom while I ate it. Isn't the hotel's bathroom nice! I can believe we've been staying here for 14 days, makes even the flies leave our wallets (I might add that the pig just bought a new one, a dandy one from Prada! And one for my dad for Father's Day from me, a Giorgio one hooray!)

So that sums up my trip, besides the Kings vs. Aces, Aces vs. set, set vs. set, set vs. straight, and all the other coolers, even PTR says I'm cold now. Sigh. Well at least I have Riches of the Amazon to keep me company ;)

Thursday, June 04, 2009

I laughed out loud at these while Lance was sleeping.. I think he must have thought I was crazy, or just being myself.. taken from the Flowerpod forums.

Stupid Lawyers

These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.

ATTORNEY : This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
ATTORNEY : And in what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS : I forget.
ATTORNEY : You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?

ATTORNEY : Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo?
WITNESS : We both do.
ATTORNEY : Voodoo?
WITNESS : We do.
ATTORNEY : You do?
WITNESS : Yes, voodoo.

ATTORNEY : Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
WITNESS : Did you actually pass the bar exam?

ATTORNEY : The youngest son, the twenty-one-year-old, how old is he?
WITNESS : Uh, he's twenty-one.

ATTORNEY : Were you present when your picture was taken?
WITNESS : Are you shittin' me?

ATTORNEY : So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
ATTORNEY : And what were you doing at that time?
WITNESS : Uh.... I was getting laid!

ATTORNEY : She had three children, right?
ATTORNEY : How many were boys?
ATTORNEY : Were there any girls?
WITNESS : Are you shittin' me? Your Honor, I think I need a
different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?

ATTORNEY : How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS : By death.
ATTORNEY : And by whose death was it terminated?
WITNESS : Now whose death do you suppose terminated it?

ATTORNEY : Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS : He was about medium height and had a beard.
ATTORNEY : Was this a male or a female?
WITNESS : Guess.

ATTORNEY : Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition
notice which I sent to your attorney?
WITNESS : No, this is how I dress when I go to work.

ATTORNEY : Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?
WITNESS : All my autopsies are performed on dead people. Would you like to rephrase that?

ATTORNEY : ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?

ATTORNEY : Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
WITNESS : The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
ATTORNEY : And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS : No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy on him!

ATTORNEY : Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
ATTORNEY : Did you check for blood pressure?
ATTORNEY : Did you check for breathing?
ATTORNEY : So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
ATTORNEY : How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS : Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY : I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS : Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.

Monday, June 01, 2009

Found a new software called WireTap.. Fabulous stuff. Lets you record any audio you can't download from the internet, and yes of course I'm can't figure out BitTorrent. And lets you edit the audio too, so you can be a mini-DJ.

On a side note, things are getting worse in Macau. It seems everyone around me is on a losing streak, or ridden with bad luck, me inclusive. As Lance will put it, winning the good players is possible, but we will always and forever, lose to fishes. So we're taking a break for the day, he's sleeping right now, next to me.

Went to D2 for a party session before Alex left Macau. Jackson, CS, DY, Alex, Lance and I. 'Til this day, I'm still horrified by their 'Golden Showers'. And haunted. What is up with guys and sexuality? Why can't everyone just be normal, boy likes girl, girl likes boy. Boys don't like boys, girls don't like girls. Yeah a little prejudiced on my part, not to mention the fact that I'm a tad racist too. I cite Russell Peters on this.

And, may I present Lanceryosuke, my very own Barbie doll a.k.a. guinea pig -

15/10/1989, into fast cars, black/silver/grey, good foie gras, poker, a degenerate gambler. Hooked on appealing visuals and in love with the world's most retarded poker player, Lance.


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